Oldies

As the 92128 denizens continue to age certain behaviors are noted that suggest concern about cognition, regularity and the multiple organs of the body. Our gatherings are marked with discussion of healthy bowels, gall bladders and the big C. We are frantically doing the New York Times crossword and sudoku to maintain our cognition and every time we lose our keys we hope it is just a “Senior Moment” and not the beginning of the slippery slope to dementia. We agree with the writer Martin Amis: ” and meanwhile time goes about the immemorial work of making everyone look and feel like shit.”

We are striving mightily to stave off the ravages of time. None of us has put our keys in the refrigerator yet and so far everyone has returned to their home after an outing. The signs are hopeful. As Oscar Wilde suggested we are, ” not young enough to know everything”” and boy do we feel it.

Some just quit the task of self improvement. After all, learning a foreign language or rebuilding a classic car is exhausting work. Fortunately-I believe- the answer lies elsewhere.

What I seem to need to fight aging is work on patience and patterns. The patience it takes to engage with people and things and thereby, to learn something and the ability to see the interrelationship of things. It takes energy to keep these things working is often daunting. I need to listen to people’s stories and the courage to keep the mind open and not shut down by prejudice or contempt. I am no longer young enough to know everything.

Avoiding certainty and a rush to judgment are the best training and I hope for the mental energy to pursue a lightness of mind . I want to be the old guy that can entertain information that is new and unexpected without defaulting to the short-sighted assurance that I ” knew that.”

This can be scary. Often the truth comes in a terrifying way. You can have your smugness obliterated and then you have to reconsider…everything.

Now I get that old latin phrase Sapere Aude…dare to be wise.